The 'lock and key' analogy and other lame attempts at justifying the double standards applied to women and sex.

"If a key opens many locks, it is a master key, but if a lock is opened by many keys it is a shitty lock." - A. Douchebag (year unknown)

No doubt you have come across this work of "genius" when a woman points out the unfairness of being called a "slut" or similar if she engages in consensual sex with multiple partners. It is assumed that this will put an end to any objections, that the woman will shut up, and things will be back to the way they should be. Yes, that's right, people actually believe this is a legitimate anti-feminist argument.

I will not only try to explain to the simple minded folk how this fails to justify their hypocrisy, but will also refute the other arguments that people like to use, as well as point out why calling anybody a slut, male or female, is no less closed minded and judgemental than somebody who, for example, is homophobic (if of course you are homophobic, then you might still want to carry on reading, this could help you).

Until very recently, I was guilty of using the word "slut" to refer to women who slept with multiple partners. I now realise how ignorant I was being, and regret it deeply. It fills me with rage whenever I see or hear other people doing it, but what makes me lose faith in humanity even more, is that bloody lock and key analogy. The way how, whenever somebody says it, has such a tone of pride to their voice or in their writing, because they think they are right, that nobody could possibly come up with a better argument. If you are one of those people, I have bad news; your attempt at keeping misogyny alive just got a bit harder.

People who like to use this little comparison seem to forget one fundamental fact: My body is not an object. My sincerest apologies, as I am aware of how disheartened you are to receive such disappointing news, but you cannot compare a part of my living body to an inanimate object - the function of which is completely different. The purpose of a lock is to keep out intruders, to stop somebody from getting inside a particular place. If the purpose of my vagina was identical to that of a lock, the human race would cease to exist. My vagina is not designed to keep out intruders. The comparison is irrelevant. You may as well compare chalk to cheese as a means of establishing a reason not to eat it.

Fortunately, people are finally beginning to see why such a poor excuse for an argument doesn't work. Unfortunately however, this does not mean that they have decided to acknowledge and accept that the name calling is unfair. Now they try to convince us that, because it is apparently so much easier for a woman to get sex than it is a man, a woman therefore deserves the name calling while a man should be praised. Nada. Exactly where is the logic in treating somebody like shit simply because they do something that is supposedly "easier" for them? I can understand why someone would get praise by "achieving" something that is difficult, but I cannot see why somebody should be ridiculed and ostracised because they do not have to make as much effort. Why would you do that? By putting forward this argument, all you have done is made a (rather biased) observation, yet failed to explain the relevancy of it. It doesn't refute any argument whatsoever. Like the lock and key analogy, it is a futile attempt to justify one's misogyny whilst not actually admitting that they are a sexist twat. If there is one thing I despise more than misogyny, it is a closet misogynist.

My final argument, used by both men and women, is the classic "Oh, it's ok, I call men sluts too!"

Now I am willing to bet that out of the people who say that, less than 1% actually do use the word slut to refer to promiscuous men. However, this is not the point I will make. Words like "slut", "slag", "cheap", "easy", "tart", "whore" and the like all have negative connotations. Using this word to describe somebody who sleeps around implies that consensual sex between adults is a bad thing. Something that should be looked down upon, ridiculed, something that is not to be tolerated.

Let me repeat the phrase "consensual sex between adults". Does that sound familiar to you? It is the one and only real defence of homosexuality. No other argument is better, because the idea of imposing laws against what consenting adults do in the privacy of their bedroom is an infringement of their civil liberties, and that's the end of it. Any liberal-thinking person would tell you that. If you think homosexuality is wrong, if the thought of having a physical/romantic relationship with a member of the same sex is unthinkable, it doesn't matter, because the actions between consenting adults, has never and will never, ever harm or affect you, or anybody else.

Likewise, if you attach such a negative connotation to anybody, male or female, sleeping with multiple partners by using words like "slut" or "whore", you are no better than a person who calls somebody a "fag" or a "dyke", because you are unfairly judging somebody based on the fact that they, an adult, had consensual sex with other adults. You are treating somebody as a lesser person than yourself because they engage in acts that harm nobody. You have made somebody else's sexual history your business, even though it is not, and that makes you no better than a homophobe, in my opinion. Perhaps what strikes me as the most distressing conclusion to this dilemma is the fact that those friends and acquaintances who refer to promiscuous women as "sluts" are the same people who claim to be open minded and non-judgemental. Yet by calling somebody a slut, in a serious sense, you are doing exactly that.